Marian the Grammarian

I know. I know. Two days of grammar in a row is quite annoying.

But, I have a question--and I was not satisfied with the answer google gave me.

Question:

When answering the phone if the person asks for you do you say, "This is she." OR "This is her."

I was always taught that you were to say "This is she"--which admittedly felt a bit unnatural to a hick from the sticks...but I obliged.

The other night Savvy answered the phone and it was her activity day leader.

Savvy pretty sure she was eating chips says, "Crunch. Crunch. Hullo."

MiMi says, "Is Savvy there?"

Savvy says, "Crunch. Ummm. Yah. This is her."

As I listened to my darling daughter, I decided it was high time for a refresher course on proper phone etiquette.

Sheesh.

No eating on the phone! I told her the importance of saying "yes" instead of "yah". I begged for a little "hello" rather than "hullo". No "ummm's" allowed. And for the love! Please say "this is she" rather than "this is her."

She seemed to take it in stride..although she did mention that the "this is she" sounded "WEIRD!"

A couple of days later, I was teaching a grammar lesson to my darling 4th graders. The lesson happened to be on proper pronoun usage. It taught about the difference between object pronouns and subject pronouns.

As I taught the lesson, I realized that "This is SHE" may not be correct.

The rule is if the pronoun being used is an object pronoun then you use the word "HER" if it is a subject pronoun you use the word "SHE".

What the?

So, Loyal Readers and if you are still with me--you'd have to be pretty loyal...

...Answer me this: In the sentence "This is SHE/HER"...is SHE/HER the subject of the sentence or the object of the sentence?

Exclamation Points: The Spice of Life!

Over the past couple of weeks, Jay has worked quite diligently on a paper about an obscure inventor in US History--Richard Jordan Gatling.

It was a bit of a struggle trying to find much information on him, as she had to use book sources...not encyclopedias or internet.

As she wrote her rough draft, she squeezed out every bit of information possible to get her essay to be long enough.

Most of her friends got inventors like Eli Whitney or John Deere--who had so much information that they struggled to condense it down.

Needless to say, Jay was a bit worried that she wouldn't get a good grade on her paper because hers wouldn't be as information packed as some others.

Yesterday, she got it back and was very pleased to see she got 49 out of 50 on her rough draft. Many of the other students did not take it very seriously, and as a result did not do very well.

Jay said, "Mom! I was so excited when I saw my grade! If I hadn't used so many exclamation points I would've gotten a perfect score!"

"Huh? What about the
exclamation points?" I asked.

"Oh! I used so many exclamation points that my teacher circled them and told me I used way too many!" she answered.

I jokingly asked her, "Has your teacher ever had a conversation with you?" {Jay is a walking, talking exclamation point. Her life is an exclamation point--and it most definitely reflects in her speech}.

Then I asked her to share some examples of her exclamationally peppered essay.

One of her sentences said, "The Gatling family had been settled there since 1700!"

Jay explained, "Mom! Don't you think that is amazing that they had been settled there for such a long time? That totally needed an exclamation point!"

Another sentence read, "He was twenty-one and ready to follow in his father's footsteps!"

Jay explained, "Mom, I think it was very exciting that he wanted to follow in his father's footsteps at the age of twenty-one!"

She continued to regale me with her exclamation point usage...with MANY, MANY sentences. you can thank me later for not sharing each one...but I found it quite hilar

Trying to help her understand the teacher's point of view I said, "Jay, exclamation points are to be used when you really need to emphasize something in your sentence. These sentences in your essay don't really need them."

"But, mom!" Jay said. "My essay would be SOOOOO boring if I didn't have exclamation points! They totally spice it up!"

She makes a valid point--it was a very spicy essay.

Let it be known now and forever on the records of the Shenanigan's Household:

Spice totally trumps grammar.

Tomato....Tomahto

Tonight as we pulled into the grocery store parking lot, I could hear Auzy trying to sound out our newly opened pizza place sign.

He said, "Nipp Ed Pizza?"

"Nyped Pizza?"

"Nipped Pizza?"

Finally, I noticed the sign he was trying to figure out.

N.Y.P.D. Pizza.

The Oldest Trick in the Book: Reborn

Ozzie and Savvy's math teacher called tonight to ask if I would sub her class next week.

After I got off the phone with her, I jokingly said to the twins, "Now that we have Miss L's phone number! We can call and prank her whenever we want."

I pretended to dial her up, "Ummm. Hi. Miss L? Is your refrigerator running?"

"Miss L. said it is," I whispered.

"Then why don't you go catch it?" I said into the phone.

"Mom!" Savvy said. "You totally got that off of Phineas and Ferb!"

"Savvy--that joke has been around forever!" I answered.

"No. Mom. I promise heard it on Phineas and Ferb the other day," she argued.

"Savvy. I promise. That joke has been around since your Grandma was a teenager," I said.

"Whoa! That is an
OLD joke!" she said.

I ♥ this Easter Message

The Sunday Funnies

Just as the Saturday afternoon session of general conference started, I realized I had failed to purchase a few key ingredients for dinner.

Since my in-laws happened to be dropping by for vittles after they attended the conference session {live and in person}--it became quite necessary for me to run to the grocery how very ox in the mireish of me.

Naturally, Savvy decided to join me.

On the way to the store, we listened to conference on the radio in my defense, I was tivoing conference--and technically we only missed one speaker--and a bunch of songs.

As we began our quick and dirty shopping spree, Savvy asked, "Hey, how come Walmart isn't playing conference in the store?"

I laughed, "Honey, they don't play conference in Walmart..I'm pretty sure that would be illegal."

She replied, "But, mom! I thought that everyone that lived in Utah HAD to listen to conference?!?"

Things that make you go hmmm?

An April Fool's Shenanigans

This morning, El Jefe woke us all up when he yelled, "Oh man! There's 6 inches of snow outside!"

The kids all yelled (tiredly),
"April Fools!"

We got ready for school and headed out the door--and it started snowing. The kids decided dad's
April Fools joke had come true.

It snowed.

And snowed.

And snowed.

They even cancelled morning recess! It looked like
El Jefe's joke really was going to happen.

On the off chance that April Fools' jokes really do come true...I texted each of my family members that I had won 10 million dollars and I was giving them each $100,000.

{Pretty generous if you ask me. Keeping my fingers crossed that this one comes to fruition.}

In other news, when my Language Arts kids came into class this morning, I handed them each a blank sheet of paper for their spelling pre-test. I began giving their test to them in the language of Ob.

Are you familiar with Ob? I learned it with my BFF in college.

{Picture it: two bored college girls singing church hymns in Ob...over a long holiday weekend. Some girls would've taken this opportunity to go binge drinking--Mel and I chose to better ourselves and learn a foreign language.}

Anyway, they used to do it on PBS's Zoom--AND it happens to be the only foreign language I'm fluent in.

Let the fooling begin:

"Nobumober Obone: Cobastoble," I said.

"Mrs. H! We don't know what your saying!" they yelled.

"Nobumober Tobwo: Knobowlobedge," I said.

"C'mon, Mrs.H," some shouted.

One of my students started listening very intently--and began translating the words for the kids. He's got a future in languages. It was pretty funny.

About half way through the test, my tongue started getting tired from all that fancy talking--and I said April Fools--and started talking in English.

Talk about some good April Foolin' times.

So who are you foolin' today?

{Haven't heard about the secret language of ob?
Watch and learn}