Cheap Steak for Cheapskates

How Verrrry Scarrry Interesting

Anyone out there who has given Dollar Tree steaks a try yet? Share!

Going Dental...all Over the Place

Have you ever gone dental crazy at the dentist's office? I have. Twice. Once, a really long time ago--but I've blocked it from memory so I don't really remember why. The second time? Yesterday.

On Saturday night, a crown on my back tooth, broke off. So, I headed into the dentist Monday morning to get it fixed (DH was home this morning to tend the sickies--Savvy and Aussie).

Heading into the dentists office, I assumed they would slap on a temporary cap and schedule me an appointment when they had more time. But, as the cursed luck would have it, a couple of their morning appointments didn't show--so they had plenty of time to gas, needle, drill, dig, mold & polish me--2 1/2 hours as a matter of fact.

I'm not generally a freak at the dentist. But, yesterday--there was no warning. I went in expecting a gentle nudge -- and left with a jaw so numb--it felt like I'd been punched by the Governor or California. So, as you judge the story I'm about to tell--I hope you'll lower the bar a bit.

It all began very innocently -- with an offer of laughing gas to calm me before two nasty shots were administered. I can't say that I love the gas. I don't hate it - but usually when they ask me if I want it I tell them no. It just makes me feel funny--(and not in a haha laughing gas is the best comedian ever kind of way either) and sometimes a little queasy to my stomach. For some reason, when they asked if I wanted gas? I said, Sure. Why. Not.

Then came the shots. One in the roof of my mouth. One in my gum. Yes. It. Hurt. Very. Much. I kept wishing that the laughing gas would knock me out. With a death-grip on the chair--and a few deep breaths--I almost cried made it through fine.

Now, loyal readers, what I'm about to say will probably make you laugh hysterically. You'll think I'm bearing a falsehood. But, what my next statement is the truth. I tell no lie. Here it is:

I do not have a big mouth.

{Clarification:

Big mouth--in the sense of

open wide...not...

..."man, will she ever shut up?"}

So when the Dr. put a big rubber block in my mouth to prop it open...and my mouth was open so wide I couldn't swallow...I'll admit it...I freaked out.

With the prop in place the dentist began to drill. I tried to find that happy place...that place where swallowing wasn't just a luxury but a way of life...but I failed. As soon as the dentist took his hand out of my mouth, I ripped out the block and swallowed--then replaced the block back into my mouth. The hygienist and dentist looked at other and then back to me--a little strangely. Little did they know, it would get stranger.

I tried to lay quietly as the dentist grinded my tooth. I tried to lay quietly and not freak out since I couldn't swallow when I felt like it. I tried to lay quietly as I searched for my happy place.

Have we established the fact that I tried to lay quietly? Good. Because--all of a sudden I started to get all hot and dizzy. I thought I was going to pass out. The doc has just asked for some other tool to stick in my mouth. When without even realizing what I was doing - I ripped the gas mask off my face, sat up, and took a couple of deep breaths.

"Are you done with the nitrous oxide ?" the hygienist asked, her eyes wide open.

Oh, I'm done honey--I thought. "Ummm. Yes, I think so," I said very calmly, like nothing freaky had just happened.

I laid back down and they commenced with the grinding, the drilling, the...you get the picture.

Four more times during my long procedure--I removed the block from my mouth to swallow. Four more times, the dentist and his lovely assistant looked at me a little strangely.

Then, the doc began to prep me with a fancy wooden splinter -- not sure what it was for --but I'm pretty sure it wasn't meant to drop down my throat. "Don't swallow that!" he said, as if I was so nuts with the swallowing at this point--I might have attempted such a thing.

Finally, the torture was finished. All that was left, was to get the mold of my back tooth so they could make a crown. As she was suctioning around my back tooth to get it dry and such--she slipped a little to far down my throat and gagged me with her suctioner - to the point I almost threw up--in her face.

At this point, I began to bribe myself like I do my kids. Myself said to myself, "Now, Nicole, if you can avoid doing one more nutty thing, I'll buy you a diet coke at Harts, a big pink sugar cookie, and I'll let you take a nap when you get home."

I realized I had finally found my happy place! (of course--it was about 2 hours too late..but still).

Thankfully, the temporary cap was cemented in place. I didn't freak out TOO much - I mean, considering what I had been through--I totally could've went dental all over the place.

And yes, myself rewarded myself with a diet coke at Harts on the way home.

Confession Time: When's the last time you went dental at the dentist?

Saturday's Warrior

Poor Savvy has been sick since Thursday. With nausea and a fever as symptoms, I thought it might be the flu. By Saturday morning at 5 am - she was on fire with the fever and the nausea -- and a lovely new addition a sore throat. I just knew she had to have strep.

Not a great day for strep by the way. She had to miss a fabulous birthday party at Boondocks. Plus, both Savvy and Aussie had their last game of the soccer season--and had to miss it (DH was out of town). I had a fabulous "Women's Conference Stake Activity" -- that I was planning on attending. Add to the mix that we had some fun and lovely visitors from Idaho (cuzin Jenny and her DH and cute kids--I'm just crossing my fingers that no one in her fam gets infected or I'm heading to Boise to play nursemaid).

Sigh. A festive Saturday it was not.

So, at high noon, we headed to the doc-in-the-box (Instacare) -- and because we're living right lucky -- we walked in and were seen right away. That was a new and choice experience. We felt like royalty since we were the only ones there (then a dog bite victim came in and that joyous feeling left us real quick-OUCH!).

Anyway, a nurse--came in and swabbed her throat. Feeling sorry for her, he said, "Would you like a juice box?" He then brought her a Capri Sun--and some Tylenol cause the fever was raging again. Such service--and with a smile! I've decided that male nurses are underappreciated in this world.

A little bit later, the doc came in, took one look at her throat and said -- oh yeah its strep -- 5th case today. He proceeded to fill out the lovely golden ticket prescription of Omnicef.

As he was filling it out, I asked him if it was possible to have Strep for a month and not know it (because Savvy had been sick with similar symptoms 3 weeks ago). He said, yes it was possible. Then he paused and asked her if it burned when she urinated?

"Yes," Savvy said (news to me, by the way--and the mother of the year award goes to...someone else).

The doc decided he'd better run a urine test - just to be on the safe side--and said to Savvy, "It's really not a big deal, honey, your mama will help you."

{In the meantime, I'm thinking - whatever Dr. Not a Big Deal -- you're not the one whose hand is going to get peed on.}

Until Saturday, I had missed out on helping a 9 year girl old pee in a cup. It ended up being a pretty hilarious experience. The nurse gave me the instructions to: First, write the name on the cup. Second, get a clean catch. Third, put on the lid. Fourth, put in the little "urine sample" tray on the paper towel. Then he left us to do the deed.

As I was writing her name on the cup, Savvy said, "Mom, I have to pee really bad."

"Good," I said.

Just then I heard the sound of peeing - only I was still writing on the cup.

"Savvy! Stop! What are you doing?" I said.

Confused, she said, "Giving my urine sample."

I explained that the urine needed to be in the cup to count as a sample.

"Ohhhh," she said. "But, what if I pee on your hand?"

"Oh honey. You will. Trust me on that," I replied.

Once she got over the fact that it was okay to pee on mommies hand, not only did she pee all over my hand, but the cup, the toilet seat and part of the floor she did just fine.

As we were washing our hands, Savvy got the giggles. "Mom, it was so funny when I peed on your hand," she laughed.

"Yes. Very. Funny." I replied.

"No, mom, you should've seen your face. It was all squishy and your eyes were closed," she said, still laughing.

"Really?" I started to laugh.

Did I mention the bathroom is really echoey?

By the time we walked out of the bathroom, we were both laughing pretty hard. Our nurse didn't look very amused -- but at this point it was either laugh or cry. We opted for levity.

As we waited in our little room for the results, Savvy looked at me and started to giggle again. I told her to stop laughing or the doc would think she was faking sick and take away her golden ticket. She laughed harder. (I think there may have been a little delirium involved - because she was close to laughing so hard she was crying--I wisely stopped making jokes).

Then the doc walked in and informed us that not only did she have strep - but she also had a bladder infection! The poor thing! No wonder she had been so miserable. I was so glad the doc thought to ask her those questions. He replaced our golden ticket of Omnicef (once a day) with one for Augmentin (grr-twice a day) -- and sent us on our merry (yes, we were still laughing) way.

Funny of the weekend: Cuzin Jen knew I was taking Savvy in for a throat culture. So, when I told her that Savvy had not only strep--but also a bladder infection, Jenny said, "Sheesh, how far down did they have to swab her to get that result?"

The Sunday Funnies

Today, as I was conducting in RS -- I announced the opening song and realized our chorister wasn't there. It immediately became my job. On a good day, I am pretty lousy at leading. Today, was far below

a good day.

I opened my hymn book and began leading a song I don't recall ever hearing, -- "Prayer is the Soul's Sincere Desire". Oh, and did I mention there were high notes! Admittedly, my alto voice did not appreciate it--therefore my singing was not spectacular.

My usual singing cronies -- also didn't appear to know the song. So, it was me sounding like an injured cat for 4 whole verses.

Why didn't I just stop with one? Well, loyal readers, I wanted to redeem myself on the second verse -- and when that didn't happen -- I just plodded on with that goal of redemption all the way to the 4th verse. Ay-yi-yi!

After the opening song/prayer, I continued my wonderful bout of conducting. Now, it was time for the practice song. Okay--in the deep recesses of my brain--I barely recognized the tune-- "Oh May my Soul Commune with Thee."

So, I began to lead--a little more confidently than before. By the end of the first verse, I realized I had been leading in 3/4 time and it was 4/4. Stellar. I tell you. Stellar. But, this time, I stopped after two verses--the learning curve was in place.

Finally, redemption was mine! The closing song was so easy--"Secret Prayer". I knew it by heart. I could have sang soprano, alto or even tenor -- all verses memorized!

We didn't have time for the closing song - as our lesson ended right on the hour-- but by golly we were going to sing at least one verse of this song.

I hate to be repetitive...but...

...Redemption was mine!

I put on my biggest smile. Held my hand in a firm leading position. Made eye contact with the women I was about to lead. Listened (not too carefully)to the introduction of the song. And began to lead and sing in my loudest soprano voice. There was only one problem with my redemptive plan--I was singing the wrong song. Or should I say--the pianist was accidentally playing the opening song--the song I didn't know.

Curses.

Shenanigan of the Day: Fantasia

Okay - I'm not one who usually blogs about Reality TV - mostly because then I would be outing myself for what I watch ...religiously...But, last nights American Idol has forced me to post outside of my normal boundaries.

In all honesty, you can't avoid weird stuff on AI when Paula Abdul is involved. But, last night's guest performer - Fantasia - was like watching a trainwreck--you wanted to look away but you couldn't. I had my finger on the fast forward button throughout her entire performance (?) -- but I couldn't bring myself to push it.

I don't know if it was her cherry-red hair, the fact that I had forgotten she had a lisp, her freshly straightened teeth, the screaming of the entire song, the weird back up singer-guy up in the rafters, her big self gettin' down with it, or the realization that she was lip-syncing her song (at the end, you could totally HEAR her singing - even though her lips weren't moving), --but watching her was mesmerizingly disturbing. Seriously, I was so stunned by her shenanigans - that Sayesha getting voted off became secondary (although YAY!).

The judges faces at the end of her performance said it all - Simon's. jaw. dropped. (I'm thinking in horror - it better be in horror!) Then, before the camera could cut away -- Fantasia tried planting a big ole smooch on Ryan - what in the world? That was some crazy stuff.

My Addictions

Hi. My name is Nicole and I'm addicted to collecting stuff:

A few weeks ago, my sis Jilly, and my sis-in-law, Ali, were giving me advice on a few decorating quandaries. I had framed some darling scrapbook paper that I was planning on hanging somewhere in my craft room. I also told them how I had been trying to find a few "N's" to put on a shelf in my room. I explained how I wanted to hang some twisted iron. I also, may have mentioned, that my DH was refusing my "mirror wall" in the basement (5-7 different mirrors hung right along the wall across from the ping pong table--talk about instant replay).

Finally, Ali kindly says, "You really like collections don't you?"

Hmmm? I thought about it for a minute and decided she was true to me! When I like something - I really like it and I want lots of it! Which can have it's ups and downs. In my house in AZ - I really liked wooden signs - and I had a lot of them (considering the square footage of my house - a whole lot of them! Two in every room--and even one in the halls). Probably a little overkill on the signs. Once a friend commented, "Your house should be called the 'sign house'." (not one of my finer decorating moments--I must admit).

So, here I am--a newly confessed addict. I've taken the first step in the 12 step program: Admitting my problem (alas, it's a problem I don't necessarily want to cure...)

Addiction #1: Clocks and Keys

(errr...Ignore the fact that one clock has a dead battery and a couple haven't been changed since daylight savings--may I recommend to any of you wanting a "clock wall"--do it on a wall low enough that it doesn't require a ladder to change batteries and time)

Addiction #2: Framed Paper and Iron
(Jilly and Ali had the fab idea to combine my love of the paper with my love of the letter "N"--and then I threw in some twisted iron for good measure--so I call this my "streamlined addiction")

Addiction #3: The Quilts: A warm and cozy addiction

Addiction #4: Old Doors (both of these are from my Grandpa S's house! He's my supplier. So, I guess I can blame him for this particular addiction--and then my Dad became the enabler when he delivered them to my garage)

Addiction #5: I love me some Ribbon! (Hey, at least it's an organized addiction)

Addiction #6: Stacking Boxes

Other collections I love (but I was too lazy/embarrassed to take pictures of) include:

Topiary Trees

Red Books - especially encyclopedias (Jo was my supplier for this addiction)

Statues that look like Artichokes

Candlestick Holders (some of that collection has been lost do to a ball thrown by Aussie)

Scrapbook Supplies

Barn Wood--Grandpa S and my Dad are also my suppliers on this one! Naughty!

Dust

Dirty Laundry

Unvacuumed Floors

Neglected Houseplants

Messy Bathrooms

Unmade Beds

(It could be worse--at least I haven't started a diet coke can wall...yet. )

Confession Time: What's your addiction?

Mother's Day Extravaganza

I am a mother who enjoys Mother's Day.

I have friends (and even my own mom) who do not enjoy Mother's Day because of the guilt they have for what type of mother they think they should be. Maybe I'm so far down on the totem pole of motherhood that the guilt escapes me?

Whatever the reason, I am grateful to the inventors of Mother's Day. I mean, what other day do you get to shirk your household duties, ignore your children, ditch out on making Sunday dinner, make your hubby do everything, laze around--all for the sake of celebrating how good you are at doing the things you are purposefully avoiding for the day?

Now, I don't mean to gush - but yesterday was about as fabulous as it could possibly get. Our family woke up early and headed to down to my mom's house. The kids gave me their presents on the way there -- among the gifts were some great books (including Stephenie Meyer's new book "The Host" which I can't wait to get started on) and a jamba juice gift card. But, the best thing ever were their homemade gifts.

Card from Aussie

{He did it in pencil- so I don't know if you can read his words or see the pictures--but they are classic (specially the Elvis pooping on my bed one) If you click on the picture it will make it bigger. Here's what it says (using his exact wording) going in order from left to right.
Remember when......We first saw Elves and we were so exited......You flooded the house. It was kinda funny but it was messy......Elves pooped on your bed. it was funny......We went to Lagoon and we went on the pirate shipe ride?......Happy Mother's Day 2008......We went to disney world and went on the tower of terror......Also Mount Everest was fun......When I sleep walked looking for a book......When jay left me inside eating cheerios and Savvy was asleep -- (a funny story for another post).

Savvy's Mother's Day Bookmark

Card from Elvis

For the past 4 years, Jay has made me a little booklet of mother-love called "A Good Mother, A Good Daughter". In it she has super funny pic's of the family with commentary. In the past, she's just gone through my old pics for her book. But this year she went digital. {DH does not feel comfortable in me posting the pics of all the kids - so I'm going to post a couple of edited pics--so you can get the idea.}

Alas, I digress. Once we got to the OC, we attended sacrament meeting in my mom's ward (my old home ward). The meeting was great - both speakers (one of my former Stake Presidents--now a high councilman) talked about the importance of family scripture reading - and I felt their testimonies so strong! Their talks totally motivated me to just do it!

There were THREE musical numbers (oh-how I love my old OC small town ward--I am a fan of the music!). First the primary kids and some ladies (some of them were my old YW leaders) sang my all time favorite Mother's Day song from the primary book "Mother Tell me the Story". Then a couple of glorious YW played a violin/piano duet of "Come Thou Fount" -- which is my all time favorite hymn! Our closing song was sung by the ward choir. My old ward has had the tradition for years - that the ward choir sings the closing song. Now, this particular song wasn't one of my fav's (hey 2 out of 3 isn't bad) but the choir was just so nostalgic to me that I smiled all the way through it.

After church, we got the standard mother's day plant (and one of my neighbors scored me a geranium in my ward - so I got a 2fer!). Then we headed to my mom's for a scrumptious dinner (in which all I had to do was bring the buns) of BBQ pork, delicious pasta salad (made by Grandma S.), yummy birthday (my mom's bday was also that day)/mother's day cake (courtesy of Aunt J and Walmart), pork and beans, sweet watermelon, chips, and plenty of diet coke.

We spent the rest of the day visiting with...

...Family...my Grandma and Grandpa S came down - and it was good to see them. I was able to chat and watch some of the Jazz game with them.

Grandma T and Auntie J were also there for the festivities--it was fun to see them--and visit. (Boy, was Grams mad when one of the Laker players cheapshotted one of the Jazz players!)

I hadn't seen my brother, Jed, forever so it was fun to see him and his cute wife, Jo and their kids.

My other brother Zach was there with his wife Ali - and she and I had a good time laughing at the men cheering on the Jazz.

Jilly and I had good times visiting together - even though we always do it on the phone --it's always better in person.

I also got to hang out a bit with my baby bro, Ange, and his cute little fiancee, Anna - she's a living doll.

Dad knitted more hats for the grandkids - Savvy got two! A brown with a hot pink stripe (she named it "Fudgie") and a blue one with a yellow stripe (I think it's going to be Sally 2). Aussie got a red one with a black stripe. So naturally, they wore them the ENTIRE day - but they did look awfully cute - even if it is the wrong season.

Let's not forget the most important reason why we were down in the OC - to celebrate my mom's b-day and mother's day--of course she got the short end of this deal--because she had to be the hostess with the mostest. Love you Mom!!!

Sigh. A nice, low key Sunday. Filled with family, presents and diet coke. It really was a great day.