Recently Played

So, one of my favorite songs used to be "Need You Now" by Lady Antebellum.

Then, the other day...I heard Auz singing it around the house, "It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk, and I need you now."

What in the?

"Auz! Why are you singing that?" I asked.

"Uh, Mom, every time that song comes on--you turn it up really loud and it's a catchy tune," he answered, and kept singing.


Somehow, hearing my 11-year-old singing about getting drunk and needing someone--has kinda ruined the song for me.

{Guess I'll be deleting that one off of
my I-tunes library.}

How I Made My Millions...

Over the weekend, Jordyn & and I went

shopping at the mall. She had a couple of gift cards to spend--and I needed some cute shirts.

We very successfully spent the gift cards {and then some} and even found me a cute shirt.

As we walked out of mall to head to our car, Jordyn found one last shirt for me {it was a super wild and crazy}.

"Hey mom! This is perfect for you," she jokingly said.

I started to say, "Hmm....That's a little too...."

"Buoyant?" she said, trying to finish my sentence.

I laughed, "That means I could use it as a flotation device, dearest."

She said, "Errr...I meant to say flamboyant."

{Yes, we giggle-snorted for quite sometime.}

Oh. So what does this have to do with my first million? I'm going to start designing flamboyant lifejackets.

"Flamboyantly Buoyant"

Whaddya think?

The Sunday Funnies: {Beware: Santa Spoiler}

Last month, I had to have "the talk" with Savvy & Auz about the tooth fairy.

Savvy had lost a tooth...the tooth fairy hadn't come for a week...and she was about to write a letter to the Tooth Fairy Organization.

You see, the tooth fairy always forgets to come to our house until like a month later. Then the kids end up getting 100 bucks okay it's more like $5 because of all the interest that accrues.

{As a matter of fact, once Savvy lost a tooth down at my mom's--and the tooth fairy came that very night. She was amazed! I told her the tooth fairy in that region must not have many kids to visit.}

Anyhow, I decided...that in order to avoid the poorhouse--and because they are both turning 12 this year...that Savvy & Auz needed to know who the tooth fairy really was.

It didn't go over well.

Especially, when Savvy asked about Santa.

And, then that cat was out of the bag.

Oh. And the Easter Bunny too.

There was a whole lot of wailing and gnashing of teeth.

It was a sad couple of days in our household.

Savvy's confusion of myth or truth came to light a few weeks ago.

We were driving down the freeway, when Savvy saw an advertisement for "A Groundhog's Day Celebration" on a billboard.

"Mom?" she asked, completely serious. "So, is the groundhog seeing his shadow real? Or is that you guys too?"

Oh what a tangled web.

Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing

Today I introduced some new vocabulary words to my 4th grade language arts class.

One of the words was "Hamlet". I told them that it was a noun--and gave them the definition: hamlet [ˈhæmlɪt]

1. a small village or group of houses

"Mrs. H? Aren't there two definitions for hamlet?" one of my students asked.

"No, just one." I said.

"But, Mrs. H--don't you want us to write down that it's also a type of food?" he persisted.

{A type of food? I thought,
"What in the world?"}

The girl behind him piped in and said, "JJ--that's an omelet not a hamlet."

What Would it Take?

To get me blogging again?

Would it be all the hilarious Sunday Funnies that have been piling up over the past few months. {There have been some doozies.
My kids are quite hilar.}



Nah.

Would it be to journal about our awesome trip to California over Christmas break?


Almost.

Would it be getting released as the RS President
in my ward?

{A girl can dream? Can't she?}

Now, granted. All of these could have been worthy causes for bringing my blog back from the dead.

But, the true reason for my rekindled interest in blogging--was the conversation I had with El Jefe this morning...in regards to our recent refinancing of our home.

Me: So, what time is the finance dude coming tonight?

El Jefe: That dude is a lady.

At this point, I went Aerosmith all over the place.

Me (singing): Duh-duh-duh-duh---Dude looks like a lady! Duh-duh-duh-duh---Dude looks like a lady!

El Jefe: Not laughing.

Me: Giggle-snorting for quite some time.



I mean how could he not laugh? I guess he wasn't raised with crazy brothers who listened to Aerosmith like it was true and everlasting gospel.

{Sorry Mom}

{Still laughing, by the way.}

So, that's when I decided that some shenanigans are just too funny not to blog.

Hence. The blog returns.

{What a funky lady.}

The Sunday Funnies

Every year my kids participate in a swim meet in Park City.

We all love it...and not entirely because of the swimming...but the extracurricular events that are available afterwards.

{Think: Shopping. Eating. and
Good Times.}

This past weekend was the Park City meet, and it did not disappoint.

The kids swam great on Friday and that evening we headed to Park City's main street to whoop it up with the night crowd.

We ate at a fun little pizza place called the
Red Banjo Pizza.

{I'm pretty sure we saw some famous people there too, because there was a group of pizza patrons wearing sunglasses...while they ate. And they looked pretty incognito, if you ask me.}

In other news, as the kids admired the wall covered in banjos, they said, "Mom, this totally looks like something you would do!"

So, because of this quirky wall......
My decorating skills have now been likened to a cheap pizza parlour's broken banjo wall.

Nice.

And now for the rest of the story...

As El Jefe was ordering our pizzas (the Red Banjo & the Little Belle--delicious by the way), he asked,
"Do you guys do pictures?"

The look on the kids' faces were priceless.

Horrified and puzzled comes to mind.

Apparently, they thought he was asking if our ski instructor/waiter would be interested in taking our formal picture.

While we ate? Hmmm. An interesting concept.

And here all El Jefe really wanted to know was if they sold drinks in pitchers...cuz all that swim-watchin' had made us thirsty.

Hence, the good times.

(the shopping came after the meet on
Saturday...and it was divine).

A Ferret's Life for Me

For the past month, Savvy has been obsessed with getting a ferret. She just loves going to Petco to look at them.

I find them absolutely disgusting.


With her birthday approaching quickly, our daily conversations have gone a bit like this:

Savvy: "Mom, I really, really want a ferret for my birthday."

Me: "Ooh! No! They are so gross!"

Savvy: "Please. I will be so good. I'll practice the violin every day. And I'll wear whatever you tell me to wear. And you can even put my hair in pigtails if you want."

Me: "No. It's not worth it. A ferret is way too stinky...and besides it would probably eat poor Elvis."

Savvy: "Sigh. Okay."

And just when I think I've crushed her hopes and dreams of getting a ferret, the conversation starts over the next day.

So, last week when she told me she wanted to be a ferret for Halloween, I knew she needed a costume intervention.

The Internet seemed like a good place to go.

We went to the Family Fun website, and I told her I would make her ANYTHING on this website she wanted to be.

As we scrolled through the list, we both saw at the same time "Boxers".

We looked at each other and started giggling. Then we clicked on it to see how they could possibly make a costume look like men's boxers...on a family website.

Let's just say it wasn't this that we saw.


It wasn't this either.



But, it was this.

{We giggled-snorted and laughed till we cried.}

I definitely should've taken this as a sign that this costume looking excursion was not going to be a productive one.

But, we pressed forward.

"How bout a bubble bather?" I asked.

"Nah," she said.

"A Jellyfish?"

"Nah."

"Maybe I could be the big, bad wolf?" she said.

Really.

We looked at the costume and she said he wasn't the right color.

There were over a hundred costumes to look at, and she looked at a total of 3 costumes after the wolf: a "Bag of Gross-eries", "Alien Encounter" and a "Little Bearded Gnome".

No princess costumes for this girl.

Finally, we had come to the end of the list.

She said, "Well. If you don't want me to be a ferret. Maybe I could be a devil-ferret?"

She wasn't kidding.

She honestly thought I would like a devil-ferret alternative.

If only she had known, she had actually gone from bad to worse.

That ferret costume is starting to look pretty good now.